


And Yet, You Do It Anyway

by ABrighterDarkness



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Awkward Conversations, Awkward Crush, Banter, Breaking Up & Making Up, Developing Friendships, Developing Relationship, F/M, First Dates, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, POV Pepper Potts, Past Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Pepper Potts Feels, Protective Natasha Romanov, Sparring, Steve Rogers Feels, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Is a Good Bro
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-04
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:20:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 16,454
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23998882
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ABrighterDarkness/pseuds/ABrighterDarkness
Summary: Steve stared at her for a long moment, eyes wide in stunned surprise and then he started laughing.  A loud, full body laugh that had Pepper grinning smugly in return. Natasha stood over them, arms crossed in front of her with an amused smirk.“Okay,” Steve managed when his laughter began to settle. “Okay, I stand corrected. Good one, Pepper.”“Even I saw that one coming, Steve,” Natasha teased. “She’s wilier than she looks.”
Relationships: Pepper Potts & Natasha Romanov, Pepper Potts & Steve Rogers, Pepper Potts & Tony Stark, Pepper Potts/Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers & Natasha Romanov, Steve Rogers & Tony Stark
Comments: 21
Kudos: 51





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, this one came to me out of the blue and I was really, really excited to write it. I was even more excited to write it when I realized how very, very few fics there are for this particular pairing. Because rare pairs are fun to delve into :). I'm actually really pleased with the way that it turned out. It is completely finished and I'll be sticking with posting this one daily so by the end of next weekend you will have the entire fic for your reading pleasure.
> 
> I have to give credit for this first chapter's inspiration to **betheflame** and so, _so_ much love and kudos to **LadyIronWinter** on Discord for reading through this and helping me to flesh out ideas to make it as lovely as it turned out. Many, many thanks <3
> 
> As always, feel free to come say hello on [Tumblr](https://alwaysabrighterdarkness.tumblr.com/)

It wasn’t unusual for Tony to avoid her. In fact, if there was one constant thing about the man that had been a consistent pain since Pepper's first day working for him, it was that Tony Stark was uncannily talented at finding his way out of whatever it was that he didn’t want to be doing. Unfortunately for her, paperwork was frequently included on that list. She had thought that when he had passed on the role of Stark Industries CEO to her, she wouldn’t have to continue fighting that particular battle of wills. 

Pepper belatedly realized that she really should have known better. She bit back a sigh of frustration as she let herself into the penthouse on yet another Stark-hunting mission that she really wished she didn’t still have to do. She didn’t bother knocking on the bedroom door either, the less amount of time Tony had to react the more likely she would be able to say her piece and get back to her own work.

“Tony,” Pepper called out and quickly launched into what she had long since learned was the best way to deal with Tony Stark. Talk firmly and quickly, get everything out before he has the opportunity to interrupt and start his own rapidfire commentary. “The investors have been demanding-- _ oh!” _

“Ms Potts!” 

“Oh, you’re not--You’re not Tony,” Pepper managed, admittedly somewhat lamely. “Oh god, I’m sorry, Steve!”

“It’s-ah-Tony’s down-uh-downstairs,” Steve stammered awkwardly. 

Pepper had of course recognized almost immediately that she had somehow managed to walk in on Steve Rogers apparently fresh out of the shower. It was only then, a moment later that the reality of the situation fully registered. She could feel the heat in her own face just as clearly as she could see the deep flush that Steve was wearing. Wearing. Or not wearing, for that matter. Oh my. 

She was staring. Oh god, she was staring. She really needed to not do that.

She quickly forced her eyes away from the blush that was very visibly travelling down his chest. And the fact that said chest was entirely visible because she had just walked in on Steve Rogers coming out of the shower. He was very awkwardly standing there. In a towel. And a blush.

“I’m going to...go now,” Pepper said, impressed with how steady she managed to make the words sound. She quickly moved back to the door but not before, despite her best efforts, her eyes travelled back to the man still standing awkwardly, hands clutching tightly to where the towel was wrapped around this waist. “Right. Going.”

When she was safely back on the other side of the door, she exhaled heavily and slumped back against the wall just beside it for a moment. She attempted to steady her heartbeat and paused, the image from what she had seen on the opposite side of the door flashing through her mind again. The passing thought that it was too bad that she hadn’t startled him enough to have dropped the towel entered into her mind. Pepper could feel her face heat at the idea and shook her head in an attempt to dislodge it from her imagination.

Unsurprisingly, it didn’t work.

She cleared her throat and pushed off of the wall, quickly moving through the penthouse and to the elevator. The doors opened as she reached it and Pepper sank back against the elevator’s wall with a sigh. “A little warning would have been nice, JARVIS.”

“Of course, Ms Potts. I should inform you that Captain Rogers is utilizing Mister Stark’s facilities,” JARVIS answered. 

“Better late than never, I guess,” Pepper muttered. “Is Tony in the Lab?”

“Yes he is,” the AI confirmed. “Shall I inform him that you are looking for him?”

“No,” she sighed, head thumping back against the wall. “No, it can wait. I’m going back to my office.” With any luck she would be able to find some task or another that was interesting enough to distract her mind from the insistent image of Steve Rogers in nothing but a towel.

She huffed a laugh and shook her head at her own thoughts. What task could possibly be distracting enough to accomplish  _ that? _

* * *

Pepper’s attention was drawn from her computer by a soft knock on the door of her office. She glanced up curiously, ready to greet whoever was dropping in for a visit only to freeze when she saw Steve standing there. He was undeniably uncomfortable, hands shoved as deep in the pockets of his jeans as he could manage, shoulders tense and a wary expression.

“Ms Potts,” he greeted quietly. “Do-do you have a moment?”

“Steve, yes, of course,” Pepper said quickly, mind finally catching up as she forced aside the memory of the last time she had seen him and the idle thought that his jeans and t-shirt was  _ almost _ as distracting as the towel had been. She stood and circled her desk, waving him in. “Come in, please.”

“Right, thanks,” Steve said, wavering at the door for a moment before approaching with carefully measured steps. 

Pepper frowned slightly at the hesitation, “Is everything okay?”

“Oh yeah. Yes,” Steve said and then winced. “I just wanted to-to apologize. For the other day. I kinda...broke my apartment? And Tony told me to use his after my run until mine is fixed. I mean, you were looking for Tony and I--”

“You...broke your apartment?” She repeated confusedly. 

“Um, Yes?” Steve answered, cringing slightly. “Not-not the whole apartment but there was,  _ is _ damage?”

Pepper looked down to her desk, fighting back the urge to laugh at the nervous rambling and the story attached to it. She cleared her throat and offered a smile instead. “Steve, you do realize that I’m the one that walked in on you without knocking, right? You really don’t have to apologize. I should be the one apologizing, really. I shouldn’t have assumed. I’m just so used to having to steamroll Tony in order to get everything in before he tries to speak.”

Steve huffed a quiet laugh of amusement and shot her a small, sympathetic smile at the explanation. Pepper imagined that Steve was quite familiar with that particular trait Tony had. His expression sobered and he continued softly, “Still. I could have-- _ should have-- _ excused myself right away. And I didn’t. I guess I was taken a bit by surprise.”

”I think we both might have had that particular problem, ” Pepper smiled. 

Steve returned the smile and shrugged, ”That was it, really. I just wanted to apologize.”

”There’s really no apologies needed, ” Pepper assured him. 

“Right. I-I’ll-uh-let you get back to work then,” he said, walking backwards a few steps. “Thanks and sorry, again.”

* * *

Pepper sighed in frustration as she entered the elevator, staring irritably at the phone in her hands. There were easily a half-dozen messages that she had sent Tony throughout the morning and, of course, not a single response. Typically, she would dismiss the brush off as Tony being Tony and having been submersed in one project or another for entirely too many consecutive hours. Unfortunately for both of them, they had a meeting later that afternoon that required both of their presences. 

“JARVIS,” Pepper frowned. “Where is Tony?”

“Mister Stark is currently in the gymnasium,” JARVIS answered. “Shall I inform him that you are looking for him?”

“No, thank you,” she answered. As usual, Pepper knew better than to give Tony time to prepare whatever evasion tactics he wanted to use. “Just take me to the gym please, JARVIS.”

“Of course, Ms Potts,” JARVIS responded and the elevator promptly began to move. Pepper eyed her phone again before closing the messenger and tucking it back into the pocket of her jacket. 

“Thank you, JARVIS,” she said politely when the doors finally opened on the appropriate level. She drew a deep breath and focused on exactly what she needed to tell Tony in order to get him into that meeting. Here’s to hoping he wasn’t also duly planned for her. Without giving that thought the opportunity to develop further, she pushed through the doors and into the gym proper.

Pepper stilled just a few steps inside, her attention caught by the not-unwelcomed sight of Steve at the punching bags. She wasn't entirely sure how she kept managing to come across him when she hadn’t before the shower incident. The idea that she might want to consider being suspicious was waylaid by way the muscles of his back and arms tensed and flexed with each strike of his fist against the bag. 

”You just missed him, ” Steve called over his shoulder without slowing his pace. 

”I’m sorry?” she asked blankly. 

Steve caught the bag and steadied it between his wrapped hands, shifting his weight until he was turned fully towards her. ”Tony, ” he said. ”You just missed him.”

”Oh! Oh, right, ” Pepper nodded, wrangling her thoughts back into safer territory. ”Right. I think he's trying to avoid me.” she sighed. 

”I'm sure you'll get him pinned down, ” Steve smiled. ”You usually do.”

”Not nearly as efficiently as I would like though, ” Pepper rolled her eyes. ”He has quite the talent for escaping.”

Steve laughed but nodded in agreement. ”Still have a better track record than I do. Care to share a few tricks with a fellow Stark wrangler?” he asked with an amused smirk. 

”Not in JARVIS’s hearing range, ” she muttered, automatically glaring toward the ceiling.

Steve grinned at the quip despite the low volume of the utterance and looked up as well. ”You wouldn't tell on Ms Potts, would you JARVIS?”

”Of course not, Captain Rogers, ” the AI answered. ”Mister Stark only requests to be notified when Ms Potts’ arrival to his location is imminent. Her methods of obtaining his location have not been required.”

Steve turned his attention back to Pepper, amused grin still firmly in place. ”There you go. Your methods are safe.”

The friendly interaction was so far removed from their previous meetings that it took her slightly off guard. She couldn't help but return the grin and laugh at the cheekiness. “And they’re going to stay that way,” she quipped back.

”That’s fair,” he agreed, grin softening into a smile, less amused and more, she thought that shyness, perhaps. He dropped his eyes from hers then and focused intently on unwinding the cloth from around his hands.

“He said that he was heading back to the lab,” he said and the shy smile turned slightly smug. “But on the way out he was asking JARVIS about what’s in the refrigerator up in the kitchen.”

Pepper blinked in confusion until his words fully registered and then found herself smiling again. ”Better catch up to him in the ‘lab’ then, ” she said thoughtfully.

”Guess so, ” he agreed. ”Good luck, Ms Potts.”

”Pepper, ” she corrected automatically. 

Steve studied her for a short moment and then nodded, ”Pepper, then.”

* * *

“Alright, are you ready to go again?” Natasha asked but without waiting for an answer, Pepper was caught in a tight hold from behind. Natasha’s arms belted around her waist, pinning her arms to her side.

Pepper had, tentatively, asked Natasha for some training. Nothing like what the other woman had, obviously, but just enough that she would have some ability to defend herself should the need arise. She wasn’t stupid. She knew that her position as CEO, her friendship with Tony and her indirect association with other members of the Avengers could potentially make her seem like an easy soft target. She had been pleasantly surprised when Natasha had easily agreed and even more so when the regular sessions seemed to strengthen her relationship with the other woman.

Not, obviously, that Natasha took it easy on her, Pepper sighed mentally. But she knew what was expected here and Pepper let her body move accordingly. After she had escaped that hold to Natasha’s satisfaction, they moved on. Practicing other holds and defenses. Pepper was certain that one Natasha was done with her, she was going to end up doing them in her sleep. She felt preemptively sorry for whomever she hypothetically shared a bed with again in the future.

The actual training shifted seamlessly into casual sparring. Pepper knew that it wasn’t really much of a challenge for someone as practiced as Natasha but the woman never really seemed to complain. If anything, Pepper got the impression that she might enjoy the more relaxed pace.

Natasha let herself be pulled easily when Pepper managed to properly execute a throw and used speed, body weight and momentum to send Natasha to the mat. Movement from the corner of her eye distracted her and she glanced up to find Steve heading toward the punching bags but watching them curiously. Unfortunately for her back, the distraction cost her when Natasha used it to kick out, catching her behind the knees and then she was down too.

“That was pitiful, Pepper,” Natasha commented, getting back to her feet. 

Pepper huffed, but accepted the hand up only to use it, just as Natasha had taught her, to hold firm and use the grip as leverage to knock her back to the mats.

“Better,” Natasha quipped. 

Pepper let herself sink back into the newly familiar rhythm of strikes and blocks, pushing harder when she began to feel Natasha increasing the speed and force used, recognizing the unspoken compliment for what it was. It was thrilling to have that realization that she was actually improving. It wasn’t much. She still wouldn’t be any sort of match for someone like Natasha in a real scenario. But that wasn’t what mattered.

“You’re leaving your left side unprotected,” Natasha commented, following the words immediately with a hit to said unprotected side. Pepper caught the striking hand before Natasha withdrew and planted her other hand firmly against Natasha’s shoulder joint, using the leverage to threaten the joint just enough that Natasha went back to the mat. Once again, Pepper was very aware that Natasha was more than skilled enough to have avoided the drop but Natasha just nodded, “Good.”

Pepper was pulled from her focus when Natasha spoke again, louder this time. “Got something you want to add, Rogers?”

“Nope,” Steve called back. “Think you got it, Nat.”

“Then your attention is probably better spent on not falling off the treadmill, don’t you think?” Natasha smirked.

“You saw nothing, Romanoff,” Steve huffed.

“I see everything, Rogers, and don’t forget it,” Natasha quipped back.

Pepper watched the banter curiously, using the interlude to grab her water bottle and calm her breathing back to something closer to normal. She absently wondered what had changed his mind to run instead of boxing like he had originally been going for. She met Steve’s eye across the gym, smiling in amusement as she set aside her water and carefully stretched out her protesting muscles. 

Natasha approached and picked up her own bottle. “You’re doing good,” she complimented.

“Thanks,” Pepper smiled. “Is it weird that I actually like it? It’s...fun.”

“Maybe in a couple more weeks I’ll trick Tony into coming down and being your test dummy,” Natasha said idly.

Pepper laughed at the thought, “That could be interesting.”

“Unless,” Natasha tilted her head in thought and then rocked back on her heels to face the rest of the gym. “Hey Steve, you should let Pepper practice throwing you around.”

Pepper pressed her hand to her mouth to muffle her automatic response to laugh when the comment had Steve misstepping and nearly falling on the treadmill. He quickly slapped the control panel and the machine stopped. “Not a word, Nat,” he warned immediately once he regained his balance. Steve swallowed thickly and then shrugged in a forced nonchalant manner, meeting Pepper’s eye evenly but pointedly ignoring Natasha’s snort of amusement, “Sure, I’ll help.”

“Next time though,” Natasha suggested, eyeing the clock. “I've got to take off. You two have fun though.”

“Bye, Natasha,” Pepper smiled. “Next week.”

“Same time, same place,” Natasha agreed over her shoulder. “Unless the world tries to end again and then we’ll just meet up the day after.”

Pepper couldn’t help but be amused by the truth of the disclaimer despite the strangeness. She shook her head and began gathering her things to head up to her apartment for a shower and a change of clothes. Before she left, she glanced back up, surprised to find that Steve was already looking in her direction. She felt her face heat at the shy appraisal, realizing suddenly how revealing the leggings and fitted top that she had chosen for sparring with Natasha were. She had learned early on that the other woman wasn’t above using a handful of loose fitting material to her advantage and had begun dressing accordingly. The look wasn’t quite leering but it was appreciative. 

“I’ll see you later, Steve,” she called, politely ignoring the blush that lit his face at being caught staring. 

He cleared his throat awkwardly but pushed through to speak, “Let me know if you do want me to spar. I’d be happy to help.”

“Nat and I are here every Saturday,” she replied in invitation and then shrugged. “Unless the world tries to end and then it’s the day after that’s over.”

“Next Saturday then,” he nodded with a smile.

As she left, her mind helpfully compiled an image combining that smile with the previous fresh-out-of-the-shower look. Pepper scolded herself mentally for her wandering imagination.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And, because I'm excited and have very little patience or impulse control when things make me excited and nervous like this story does, here, have another chapter :).

Pepper had quickly learned once their training sessions began to bleed into sparring sessions that sparring against Natasha was exhausting. Even though she knew that Natasha wasn’t using near her full skill, it was somehow simultaneously challenging, thrilling and entirely exhausting. She hadn’t been lying though when she had said that she was enjoying it.

She didn’t know why but she had thought that it would be more of the same type of thing when Natasha had roped Steve into helping. It wasn’t. In hindsight, maybe that should have been obvious considering that Steve was easily more than twice her size, even if he hadn’t had the serum, his build alone would have been an entirely different challenge than what sparring with Natasha was. 

And then was the entirely distracting point that it was  _ Steve _ and she was suddenly a lot more hands-on with his body than she had even passingly considered ever being. But that was a whole different train of thought that was exceedingly unhelpful at the moment.

Natasha stood just outside the marked sparring area and provided a steady stream of critiques as Pepper scrambled to keep up with Steve’s careful strikes and blocks. She bit back a yelp when he managed to duck around behind her, one heavy arm bracing across her chest and hand gripping her shoulder, while a knee found the back of hers. Thankfully, he used his grip to slow her fall to the mat, essentially laying her on it rather than the drop that she braced for.

“Come on, Pepper,” Natasha called. “If he’s dumb enough to rush you then you need to be smart enough to use that against him. Bigger they are, the harder they fall.”

“Right,” Pepper bit out as Steve offered a hand to help her back to her feet. She shook out her arms and then settled back into position to start again. Not for the first time, Natasha’s critical study prickled sharply. And, Pepper noticed, Steve hadn’t even begun breaking a sweat and his breathing was still even. 

Steve grinned in amusement at her obvious irritation and Pepper narrowed her eyes. This time, when Steve rushed her, Pepper forced herself to move like she had been spending weeks being trained to do instead of thinking about what she ought to do. She held out longer, this time and was secretly pleased with the bitten back grunts when she managed to land a strike. Apparently the pointers that Natasha had drilled into her about pressure points had more to them than she had originally given them credit for.

She still ended up on the mats though. She thought that, maybe, she ought to just get used to the feeling.

“Alright, Rogers, you’re getting entirely too smug,” Natasha said, approaching them with a smirk. “My turn. Consider it a demo.”

“I dunno, Nat, I was kinda looking forward to not getting my ass kicked today,” Steve grinned, watching Natasha even as he offered a hand to help Pepper back up.

Pepper stared at the hand for a moment before reaching for it. Using his distraction, Pepper utilized the same method as she used on Natasha the week before though modified for a larger opponent, a harsh tug on his arm and planting her foot into the back of his knee sent him down to the mat beside her with a grunt.

Steve stared at her for a long moment, eyes wide in stunned surprise and then he started laughing. A loud, full body laugh that had Pepper grinning smugly in return. Natasha stood over them, arms crossed in front of her with an amused smirk. 

“Okay,” Steve managed when his laughter began to settle. “Okay, I stand corrected. Good one, Pepper.”

“Even I saw that one coming, Steve,” Natasha teased. “She’s wilier than she looks.”

“She,” Pepper interrupted. “Is just tired of being the only one hitting the mats.” She shrugged slightly, “And between spending years around Tony and now you two? I’ve been taught wiliness by the best, I think.”

“I’m not sure if that was an insult or a compliment,” Steve said after a beat.

“Apparently we’re in the same category as Tony Stark,” Natasha said dryly.

“Which is why I’m not sure if it was an insult or a compliment,” Steve smirked.

Natasha hummed thoughtfully, “I’m going to have to go with both.”

“You said it, not me,” Pepper grinned and pushed to sit upright. 

“At least I’m in good company,” Steve shrugged, pushing himself back to his feet. He started to offer Pepper a hand up again and then narrowed his eyes in playful suspicion, “Not falling for that one again.”

“What happened to being a gentleman?” Natasha asked.

“First you want to kick my ass and now you want me to be a gentleman?” Steve countered with a smirk. “Gonna need you to make up your mind, Nat.”

Pepper laughed softly at the banter as she got to her feet and made her way over to where she had dropped off her water bottle. She took a long drink before putting the cap back on and dropping it back to the floor. “I think I was promised a show,” she pointed out idly. “Something about checking egos.”

“Checking egos,” Natasha repeated with a slow grin. “I like it. Sorry, Steve, I’m keeping her.”

“Sounds like it’s not my ego that needs checked,” Steve snarked back. “I thought we were sparring?”

Natasha arched a brow challenging and settled into position and Steve smirked. Pepper had several consecutive thoughts as she watched from the sidelines as the two of them sparred. The first being that it was ridiculously satisfying to watch someone as small-built as Natasha drop someone as large as Steve over and over again. And then there was pure entertainment value of their almost non-stop bickering, taunting, and banter. 

And the final, and most distracting of the three, was seeing Steve finally begin to break a sweat and his breathing coming in sharp pants toward the end and the way the muscles of his arms stretched and flexed and strained as he moved. She couldn’t help but wonder what it looked like when he wasn’t actually holding back all of that strength she knew, in theory, that he was capable of. 

Steve’s hands suddenly flashed out quickly to catch Natasha before she could hit the mats in what looked like it could have been a fairly painful fall and set her carefully on her feet. Natasha nodded her thanks and trailed over to where Pepper stood to grab her own water bottle. Pepper noticed that even though there was nothing said, the pair seemed to be naturally on the same wavelength since Steve looked completely at ease, no longer watching Natasha’s movements for potential tells. 

As they each gathered their belongings in preparation to leave the gym, the banter continued with Pepper easily included in the playful conversation. There was no awkward pause as they tried to figure out where she fit. It just was. Pepper couldn’t help but think that it was odd but not unwelcome to somehow suddenly be included in on this odd dynamic Steve and Natasha seemed to share. 

Even as they splintered off at the doors, each heading their own direction for whatever else they had planned for the rest of their Saturday, there was still a sense of friendly comradery. She wasn’t sure how, exactly, she managed to land two budding friendships just by asking for some self-defense training but she certainly wasn’t about to question or complain about it.

* * *

Even with her growing friendships with Steve and Natasha and her longstanding friendship with Tony, Pepper didn’t often go to the common floor area of the Avengers’ floors of the Tower. Not unless she was specifically looking for Tony or had specifically been invited. She didn’t quite feel like she was a part of that particular world or had the freedom to come and go as she pleased. So she didn’t, usually.

Natasha had been by her office for lunch earlier, though, and had mentioned that the team had somehow managed to convince Doctor Banner to cook. An invitation to join them had immediately followed. One that Pepper truly wished she could have accepted but she had known that the big meeting the following day meant a late night at the office.

“There will be leftovers,” Natasha shrugged. “Bruce always ends up making plenty. It’s one of the few times the kitchen actually has more food than we can eat at one time.”

It had taken multiple reassurances that the team wouldn’t mind that Pepper tentatively agreed to Natasha’s “help yourself”. Which was how, despite her usual hesitance, Pepper found herself on the Avengers floor with JARVIS lighting the way to the kitchen at nearly midnight. She was mentally exhausted from a day--and night--of staring down contracts and negotiations into some semblance of compliance and, frankly, Doctor Banner’s cooking sounded like a wonderful way to end her day.

That was, until she turned from the refrigerator, hands full and suddenly realized that she wasn’t alone. Pepper gasped and only just managed to bite back the automatic yell that wanted to escape.

Steve slowly raised his eyes from where he had been staring blankly at the countertop to meet hers. Though it seemed to take a brief moment for any sort of recognition to register.

“Steve,” Pepper gasped in an attempt to steady her suddenly racing heart. “I didn’t see you there, sorry.”

“S’alright,” he shrugged, eyes dropping back to the counter.

She frowned in concern at the sullenness of his expression and body language. His hair stood on end, as though he had been digging his hands through repeatedly. Shoulders were slumped and rounded slightly inward. Most concerning, was the hollowness of his eyes and the distant stare. Pepper wavered for a moment, debating whether to press or to let it go. “I-I was going to heat up some of the dinner from earlier,” she said tentatively. “Did you want some?”

He didn’t answer for a moment and then slowly shook his head. “No,” he said shortly.

“Oh. Okay,” Pepper said. She bit her lip indecisively before sighing quietly and working her way through the kitchen, pulling out the necessary dishes to reheat her late dinner. As the microwave hummed, she tapped her nails thoughtfully against the countertop, shifting on her heels to study Steve curiously. 

Despite their interactions becoming more frequent in recent weeks, Pepper didn’t know the man well enough to gauge what she should and shouldn’t do. He had always been polite, even if their initial meetings years before had struck a less-friendly more-professional line. He hadn’t been rude or particularly prickly toward her before. Even now, it didn’t seem as though the sullen abruptness was directed at  _ her. _ Truthfully, she wasn’t entirely convinced that he was fully aware of who was even in the kitchen with him. 

The microwave beeped and she jolted, moving quickly to silence the sudden noise and pulling her plate onto the counter. Mentally, she debated the merits of escaping back to her own apartment and just bringing the dishes back another time. She pushed the thought aside, reaching into the cabinet for two glasses. She filled both with water from the pitcher in the refrigerator. 

Nudging one across the counter to stop in front of Steve, Pepper gathered the second glass, her plate and utensils and settled into the seat beside him. He didn’t thank her, didn’t say a word that indicated any sort of acknowledgement, just lifted his gaze from the counter to stare blankly at the glass for a long moment. 

Pepper chose not to speak further, following his lead. She could clearly recall Tony’s similar moods following Afghanistan where attempting to force conversation often led to angry outbursts and harsh words that he would only regret later. She couldn’t be sure that Steve would react the same way but she couldn’t be sure that he wouldn’t either. He was obviously feeling rotten enough as it was without possibly adding guilt on top of it. But she could at least be a quiet presence for whatever it was he was dealing with.

Satisfied with her decision up to that point, Pepper tucked into her food. She could feel his eyes on her but didn’t meet them. When she finished, she wordlessly went through the steps to rinse her dishes and put them in the dishwasher before heading back toward the elevator. She hesitated when she drew level with him again and then rested her hand lightly on his where it rested on the counter and offered a gentle squeeze.

“Good night, Steve,” she said quietly. He didn’t answer though she hadn’t really expected him to. 

* * *

Pepper pressed her fingertips to her temple as her eyes rapidly scanned the frustratingly contrary document in front of her. If she weren’t expected in a meeting to review that exact document, Pepper probably would have already pushed it to the side and moved on to something else. As it was, she had an hour left before the meeting to make sure that she was prepared to combat old, rich men who automatically assumed that she was clueless. 

Her attention was drawn from the document to the soft knock at the door to her office. Pepper bit back a sigh of frustration and called for whoever it was to enter. Hopefully, with any luck, it would be a short interruption. She blinked in surprise when Steve peeked around the door, stepping fully into her office and carefully shutting the door behind him.

“Steve,” she greeted, dropping the paperwork onto her desk and turning her chair fully to face him.

“Pepper, hi,” he smiled. “Listen, I just wanted to apologize again. For last night.”

“You don’t need to apologize for that,” she assured him.

“I really think that I do,” he disagreed. “Not for startling you. Well, I’m sorry for that too. But for the way I acted after. Just because I was having a bad night doesn’t give me the right to be rude.”

“Are you okay?” she asked. She had wondered, when he had all but ignored her presence entirely after she had unwittingly stumbled upon him. He looked better in the light of day. Not nearly as pained and haunted as what she had witnessed the night before. She wasn’t sure if it was because he actually felt better or if he was just that good at hiding it. She suspected that it was the latter.

He looked startled by the question at first but smiled softly and shrugged, “Yeah. I’m good. Or at least I’m getting there. Thank you.”

“Then, there’s no apologies necessary,” Pepper said with a small smile of her own.

“Still, I was wondering if maybe you’d let me make it up to you?” He asked, a small vein of hesitation in his voice that she could hear. “Lunch? Maybe?”

Pepper winced and eyed the clock on her computer, “Steve, I really can’t today. I’m sorry, I just have a meeting--.”

“It’s okay,” he interjected quickly. “It’s okay, really, don’t apologize. You’re a busy woman.” Pepper could hear slight disappointment in the words but it was drowned out by the blatant admiration in his tone.

“Dinner,” she blurted before her mind fully caught up.

“Dinner?” he repeated, head tilted curiously.

“Yes, dinner,” Pepper said, more firmly. “You could take me to dinner instead of lunch.”

Steve’s smile grew slow and Pepper watched the light flush sweep across his face at a much more rapid pace. She had to admit, she was growing quite fond of that blush. “I’d like that,” he agreed after a beat. “Tonight? Six-thirty?”

Pepper briefly considered her schedule for the rest of the day and nodded decisively. “Six-thirty,” she agreed. 

“Great,” he smiled. “I’ll-uh-I’ll see you then. Good luck on your meeting.”

“Thanks,” she said with a small laugh. “I could use all the luck I can get.”

“Nah, you’ve got this,” Steve disagreed with quiet confidence. “See you tonight, Pepper.”

“Bye Steve,” she returned, leaning back into her chair as he flashed a small grin and slipped back out of the office. 

She sat there for a full five seconds before realization and panic flooded in. Pepper eyed the document in front of her before shoving it out of the way and scrambling for her phone, scrolling through the contacts list and quickly hitting the call button on the screen.

Pepper tapped her nails against the top of her desk as the phone rang twice in her ear. When it connected on the third ring, words flooded out and she didn’t even have the excuse of trying to preempt Tony this time.

“Nat. Natasha, I have a problem. Well, not exactly a problem-problem. It’s kind of a non-problem which kind of  _ is _ the problem,” she rambled. “So it’s a problem. You’re good with problems.”

“Pepper,” Natasha said, drawing her name out slightly though Pepper couldn’t quite tell if it was amusement or something else entirely in the woman’s voice. “You’re sounding like Tony. Breathe, please. Are you going to tell me what this problematic non-problem is or should I start guessing?”

“I think I just asked Steve on a date. I have a date. Tonight,” Pepper blurted out and winced slightly at the admission.

“By Steve, I’m assuming you’re not talking about the creepy-Steve from accounting?” Natasha asked. It was absolutely amusement that time.

“What? No. Not creepy accounting Steve,” Pepper frowned, shaking her head sharply even though it wasn’t exactly an audible gesture.

“Cap-Steve, then,” Natasha said. “What time?”

“Six-thirty?” Pepper answered slowly.

“I’ll see you at five,” Natasha replied decisively. “Until then, stop thinking about Rogers’ ass in jeans and focus on your meeting.”

“I actually wasn’t thinking about his ass in jeans until now. Thanks for that, Natasha,” Pepper groaned, scowling slightly at the low laugh on the other end of the line though suddenly incredibly grateful that she had never told Natasha about the whole shower incident. “Okay. Okay. Five then. Thanks, Natasha. Really.”

“Sure,” Natasha answered easily, Pepper could almost see the casual shrug that accompanied the word. “I’ll go see if I can worm the plan out of Steve so we can prepare.”

“Right,” Pepper sighed. “Preparing is good.”

“Focus, Pepper. Focus,” Natasha scolded.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter up! I hope that you enjoy!

Natasha kicked her out of the apartment with a smirk at twenty after six and Pepper couldn’t help but feel exceedingly grateful for the woman. Despite having to combat Pepper’s growing nerves, it had actually been a very pleasant afternoon. She thought that might be a good indicator as to how her evening would go as well. At least she could hope.

When she reached the elevators, JARVIS opened the doors without prompting, closing behind her and moving as soon as she settled. “Captain Rogers is already waiting for you in the garage, Ms Potts.”

“Thank you, JARVIS,” Pepper replied. She took a deep breath to try to push away the rising nerves. Before she felt remotely calm, the doors opened again. She bit back a sigh and pushed her way off of the elevator only to blink in surprise at the sight that greeted her.

Steve was already there, crouched next to a motorcycle seemingly giving it a final checkover before they left. Jeans--leaving her mind to wander back to Natasha’s comment about his ass, she wasn’t wrong after all--and a leather jacket stretching across his broad shoulders.

Because Steve drove a motorcycle, not a car. 

Pepper looked down at herself and suddenly the tight ponytail, fitted jeans and stylish but sturdy boots that Natasha had all but forced her into made an alarming amount of sense. She wasn’t quite sure if nerves or excitement was the more prominent feeling anymore.

“Pepper, hi,” Steve said, pushing to his feet and turning to face her. He seemed to pause a moment, his mouth slightly agape and eyes widening as he took her in. She felt a slight rush of pride at the way his greeting cut off and he seemed to linger without the leering that she had experienced as a precursor to previous dates. He cleared his throat, a now familiar flush rising over his face and met her gaze steadily. “Are-uh-are you ready?”

“Yes,” Pepper agreed quickly. “Where are we going?”

He winced slightly and his flush deepened, though it seemed like it was genuine embarrassment and Pepper frowned slightly in concern. “I know that you-uh-are probably more used to the fancier stuff,” he said. “But I-I kinda thought we might do a bit more casual? For tonight? I mean, if that’s okay.”

“I don’t get too many opportunities to do casual,” Pepper admitted with a smile, recognizing her own nervousness reflected back at her. “I’m sure whatever you have planned will be fun, Steve.”

His relief was evident when he smiled again and tension seemed to bleed out of his shoulders. “You’re not allergic to anything but the strawberries, right?” Steve asked suddenly, brows furrowed thoughtfully.

Pepper startled slightly at the question. “Just-Just strawberries. But how--?”

“Tony mentioned it once, a while back, that he mixed up why strawberries were important,” he admitted shyly. 

“Oh, right,” Pepper nodded, still feeling off-kilter that he knew and remembered such a small, random detail. 

“Right,” He echoed and then led the way toward the bike, pulling a helmet from one of the saddlebags and turning back to her. The shyness had given away to alert attentiveness as he stepped forward into her space and gently placed the helmet on her head. He tapped her chin gently urging her to look up and when she complied his fingers fastened the straps and carefully checked the tightness. His fingers lingered an extra moment against her chin and Pepper’s attention caught on the soft intensity of his eyes before tracking the way his tongue swiped across his lips. “Give me just a minute to settle and I’ll help you on,” he said softly and then let his hands fall away from her face and took a reluctant half-step backwards.

Pepper nodded slowly in understanding and watched with a sense of fascination as he easily tossed one leg over the bike and settled onto the seat. She quietly admired the way he effortlessly pulled the bike upright and released the kickstand. She might have allowed her attention to linger more on the fit of his jeans than the bike, but that was her business. Once he was seemingly satisfied, he turned back and extended his hand out to her.

When she placed her hand in his, he closed his fingers around hers and guided her forward and placed her hand on his shoulder. “Okay, you’re going to want to put this foot,” he gently tapped her right leg, just below the knee, “on the peg right there. There’s another one in the same place on the other side. Use my shoulders for balance if you need to, you’re not gonna knock me over.”

Pepper carefully followed his instructions, sighing in quiet relief when her left foot found the peg he had told her would be there on the other side. “I’m gonna start her up now. It’ll feel weird when we start moving but I won’t let you fall, okay?”

“Okay,” Pepper agreed nervously. The engine turned over and started with a loud purr and she jolted slightly at the sound.

“You alright?” he asked over his shoulder.

“Yes, fine. I’m fine,” she nodded. He shifted slightly, the bike rocking with his movements, but he clearly had enough control over it that even as unsettling as the rocking was it didn’t feel anywhere near tipping. He carefully lifted her hands from his shoulders and guided them around his waist and Pepper swallowed thickly around the feeling of his dense muscles beneath her hands. 

“Might wanna hold on,” Steve said and she could almost hear the smile in his voice over the constant roar of the motorcycle. Despite her nerves, Pepper slid further forward on the seat and curled her fingers into the fabric of his shirt. One of his hands, large and warm, rested over hers for a brief moment before he took a hold of the handlebars again. 

Pepper startled slightly when they began moving, her hands and arms automatically tightening around him as he guided the bike from the garage and out onto the city streets. It was several moments into the ride that Pepper began to relax, her fingers uncurling from the deathgrip she had held his shirt in and spreading flat against his abdomen and she let herself look around from what she realized was an entirely different vantage point. It was unique even from driving herself or in the backseat while Happy drove whatever vehicle they were using for the day. 

She looked around curiously as Steve carefully guided the bike into a parking spot and turned off the engine. It took a brief moment for her ears to adjust to the sudden quiet. His hand rested over hers again, squeezing gently before helping her off of the bike in a reverse of the process it had been to get on. When she was safely back with two feet on solid ground, Steve quickly set the bike on its stand and climbed off as well. 

Pepper blinked in surprise when his finger tapped gently under her chin again and she automatically looked up at his urging. “Let’s get this off of you,” he said quietly with a smile, his fingers quickly working at the fastening for the helmet. He carefully pulled it off of her head and hung it loosely from his handlebars before turning his attention fully back to her. He laughed softly and his hands came back up, brushing the hair that the helmet had managed to dislodge from her ponytail back from her face.

“Helmet hair?” she asked with a short laugh. 

“Something like that,” he murmured and Pepper’s breath caught at the intensity of his expression. “Come on,” Steve said quietly after a moment. “I recall something about owing you dinner.”

It turned out that dinner was a small Indian restaurant bookended by seemingly random little shops on either side. Pepper looked around curiously as Steve guided her to a booth near the back corner of the restaurant with a hand resting lightly on the small of her back. The inside was tastefully decorated with murals that looked to have been hand painted extending across two of the walls. 

The food was delicious and authentic and the conversation flowed surprisingly well. Steve’s shyness reappeared periodically, generally when answering questions about himself. Despite the evident hesitation, he didn’t seem to bulk or hedge his answers, instead she was a little surprised at how forthcoming he was about himself.

She had to admit, after spending her days in an environment where lies and half-truths were a way of life, it was refreshing to have an open conversation. 

“Do you enjoy it?” he asked curiously. “The CEO and everything?”

“I do,” Pepper said with a small smile. “When Tony first told me that he was naming me the CEO, it was overwhelming and intimidating,” she admitted. “But I do enjoy it now, for the most part. It’s still overwhelming and intimidating some days though. On those days I miss the times when my biggest concern was making sure Tony remembered to feed himself.”

Steve laughed at the quip, “I can understand that, I think. It can be...It can be hard to live up to the expectations and demands while still trying to hold onto yourself too.”

“True,” Pepper agreed. “I imagine it’s a bit different for you though. Bigger, I guess.”

Steve eyed her for a moment and shook his head with a laugh that was different than the others, heavier. “Don’t sell yourself short, Pepper. What you do? Stepping up in what’s still somehow considered a ‘man’s world’ and doing it better than most of those men? Kicking through every obstacle put in your way? And  _ succeeding? _ That’s no small thing.”

“I know. I know it’s not,” she sighed. “It’s frustrating, you know? I’ve been CEO at Stark Industries for two years now. I’m still fighting for even the smallest bit of respect every single time I walk into a meeting. There are some of our clients that Tony still has to be present for because they won’t take a woman seriously.”

“And yet, you do it anyway,” he said admiringly. 

“And I do it anyway,” she agreed with a small laugh. 

“Don’t try to compare what you’re accomplishing to-to me or to Tony or anyone else,” he said with soft urgency, slowly reaching across the small table to grip her hand. “You might have been given the CEO position but you  _ earn _ it every day. I know Tony’s smug for days after seeing you tear into board members who think they can push you around.”

“ _ I’m _ pretty smug after tearing into elitist board members,” Pepper admitted with a laugh.

“You could just punch them,” Steve shrugged with a fond smile that Pepper had slowly come to recognize as nostalgia. 

Pepper arched a brow, “I don’t think an assault charge would help my credibility.”

“It might depend on who you punched,” he countered.

“Don’t tempt me,” she said, narrowing her eyes with a smirk. 

Steve just grinned in response and pushed his empty plate aside. “You about ready? There’s-There’s a place a couple blocks up that I thought we could go for ice cream?” Pepper quickly agreed and Steve paid the bill, standing from his seat and then offered his hand to help her up. 

“Do you want to walk or would you prefer we take the bike?” he asked as he guided her from the restaurant, hand resting lightly on her back once again.

She could admit that she was more than slightly tempted to choose the bike, if only for an excuse to hold onto him again. But it was a surprisingly nice evening and the walk sounded nice in its own right. After a moment, she shifted mid-step until they were even rather than her walking just slightly ahead and slipped her arm through his. “We can walk,” she answered.

He smiled but tipped his head in a nod of agreement, leading the way down the sidewalk in the direction of his ice cream shop. The sidewalks were busy enough that they still had to periodically maneuver around others but it was still surprisingly pleasant. It had been awhile since Pepper had been out to just walk rather than being driven around to her destination. 

Suddenly, Steve’s arm tensed under her hand and she glanced up in confusion. His expression was tight, brows furrowed, and his eyes were rapidly scanning their surroundings.

“Steve?” She prompted. “What’s going on?”

He urged her out of the stream of foot traffic until drawing to a stop near the end unit of the line of shops. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I just need--I can’t just....Stay here, please.”

Before she could ask or say anything further, he was ducking around the corner, jaw set and shoulders square. Pepper frowned after him for a short moment before following him in a sudden rush of stubbornness. If something was wrong enough to set him on edge, she wasn’t about to just sit around and wait for it to blow up in his face, supersoldier or not.

She couldn’t have said what she had been expecting when she rounded the corner into the darkened alleyway. But she was fairly certain that seeing Steve pinning a large man to the brick wall a foot off the ground wasn’t it. 

“--a lady tells you to stop, you stop,” she heard Steve snarl angrily. It was then that Pepper zoned in on the crumpled form against the opposite wall and the situation registered fully in her mind. Pepper darted forward to kneel next to the woman, resting a gentle hand on her shoulder, mindful of the rapidly bruising handprint on her upper arm.

“Come on,” Pepper urged gently. “Let me get you out of here.”

The girl, Pepper noted that she couldn’t be more than early twenties at the latest, shakily got to her feet. Pepper wrapped an arm protectively across her shoulders and led the way back to the main sidewalk, stealing a glance over her shoulder where Steve was still drilling the finer points of being a gentleman to the man still pinned to the wall.

She stayed with the girl, helping to calm her breathing and offering to call for a ride somewhere safe. Steve rounded the corner of the building a few moments later, his tight, angry expression softening when he found the two women. He approached slowly and spoke gently when he reached them. 

”Is there someone we can call for you?” he asked the girl.

The girl looked up warily and her eyes flickered between Pepper and Steve and then back again, widening in obvious recognition. Steve just smiled somewhat sheepishly and the girl tentatively returned the gesture. “No, it’s okay,” she said finally. “Ms Potts already messaged my mom. She’s on her way.”

”Good, ” Steve nodded. ”We’ll wait with you until she gets here.” He assured her, meeting Pepper’s gaze questioningly and she just nodded in agreement. It was another twenty minutes of constant idle conversation and Steve telling silly stories about the various members of the Avengers in an effort to keep the young woman distracted until her mother arrived. And another ten before Steve and Pepper found themselves standing awkwardly on the sidewalk together.

”Sorry, ” Steve winced sheepishly. ”I could hear him yelling at her and she was telling him to stop and I couldn't just pretend that I didn't see it.”

“Steve,” Pepper said with a small disbelieving laugh. “You have a bad habit of apologizing for things that you really don’t need to apologize for. You did the right thing, ” she smiled, stretching up to press a kiss to his cheek and then wrapping her arm around his, tugging back in the direction they had originally been heading. ”Now, about that ice cream.”

”You know, ” he said thoughtfully a few moments later as they approached the shop. ”I’m pretty sure that's the first time I've been commended for fighting in an alley.”

”Probably because that's the first time you won a fight in an alley, ” Pepper teased. 

”You might be right, ” he grinned. 

* * *

“So,” Tony said suddenly the moment she stepped into the lab. Apparently getting ahead of him wasn’t going to be an effective tactic today. Pepper sighed inwardly and braced herself for whatever verbal onslaught was headed her way. “You and Cap, huh?”

“I’m sorry?” Pepper frowned, blinking in confusion at the unexpected topic.

“You and Cap? Steve? Tall, muscly blonde that you went to dinner with? That Cap?” Tony said, not glancing up from whatever project had captured his attention.

“What about him?” She asked, unable to find any clarification and refusing to provide information that wasn’t specifically asked for. 

“Look, Pep,” Tony sighed, leaning back into his chair and spinning to face her head on. “I adore you and you know I do but are you sure you know what you’re doing?”

“Tony, if you’ve got something to ask or say can you just say it?” Pepper sighed. “Without the vagueness?”

“Okay, I can do to-the-point, sure,” Tony shrugged and stared at her for a long moment. “Steve Rogers isn’t any more capable of not being Cap than I am of not being Iron Man,” he said bluntly. “Probably less so because, frankly, that’s nearly all he actually has in this century. Are you sure you want to go down that road again?”

“I don’t know,” Pepper said honestly. “It’s...new, Tony. It was one date.”

“Don’t put yourself back there, Pep,” Tony said quietly. “Not for me, not for Steve, not for anyone but yourself. If you really want to go after Cap, by all means, I doubt anyone with eyes would blame you. But--,” he winced and fell uncharacteristically silent.

“But?” She prompted curiously.

“The thing with Cap,  _ Steve,” _ Tony paused and sighed. “We’ve yet to find a physical injury that Cap isn’t capable of recovering from. That includes a should-be fatal plane crash and seventy years frozen at the bottom of the ocean, if that tells you anything. Finding out that nearly everyone he ever knew was dead? That’s a permanent injury to Steve Rogers. Learning that Aunt Peg’s not got much time left? That she doesn’t remember half the time? That’s a permanent injury. That this team scattered the moment the aliens were gone? That’s one that’s only just started patching itself back up.”

Pepper shifted her weight and considered the sudden burst of information. “So what are you saying, Tony?” she asked after a moment.

“I’m saying,” he said evenly. “That you and I? The team? The people that he cares about? We’re more capable of hurting Steve than any damned knife, bullet, bomb, or whatever else.” 

“You know,” She said thoughtfully. “I never thought I’d see the day when you were lecturing me about feelings.”

“If you don’t want my advice, don’t take it,” he said, cooly dismissive. Which Pepper supposed she deserved. “I just don’t want to see either of you hurt again.”

“No, you’re right. I’m sorry,” Pepper sighed. “I don’t want a repeat of that either.”

“Just be sure you know what you’re doing, Pep,” Tony sighed, turning back to his work. “For both of your sakes.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is chapter 4! I hope that you enjoy!

The conversation with Tony lingered in her mind, popping back into the forefront of her thoughts at inconvenient times. He was right that she was walking herself down the same path that had led to entirely too many painful arguments between her and Tony. Distorted expectations and painfully unrealistic demands. Pepper was well aware, in hindsight, of how much she had hurt Tony, how cold and harsh she had been there toward the end. She was astounded on a regular basis that she was lucky enough to still be able to count Tony as one of her best friends, despite that. 

_ Steve Rogers isn’t any more capable of not being Cap than I am of not being Iron Man, _

She knew that was the truth of the matter and she knew that Tony hadn’t used that particular wording to be cruel. When he wanted to, he had a knack for getting right to the heart of a problem and laying it bare. Steve was no more likely than Tony to see the world crumbling around him and be capable of sitting back and doing nothing to try and stop it. 

Could she do that again? Watch someone she cared so much about run head first into the fight that they might not come back out of? She hated herself, just a little bit, for being fairly certain in the knowledge that she wasn’t strong enough to be that. But it was that decision that had her seated next to Steve, in the more comfortable chairs at the opposite side of her office from her desk having the conversation that she really didn’t want to have but knew needed to happen.

“I just,” Pepper sighed and ran a weary hand over her face, letting it drop back into her lap immediately after. “I’ve been thinking. A lot, actually. And I really like you, Steve. I just feel like this is a bad idea.”

“May I ask why?” he asked tentatively.

Pepper gave herself a moment to gather her thoughts, to try to properly articulate the concerns that had been bouncing around chaotically through her mind in the days following her conversation with Tony. “I’m not a part of your world and I don’t think that I can be,” she said finally. “When I was with Tony and he became Iron Man. I was terrified all the time, everytime he left in that suit, that maybe this time was going to be the time he wasn’t going to come back home.”

“I couldn’t handle it, Steve,” Pepper admitted quietly. “And-and, God, asking-- _ demanding-- _ that he choose between me and  _ himself? _ I-I wasn’t wrong for admitting that I couldn’t handle it. I know that. But I don’t want to fall into being that person again. I don’t want to be so afraid that I lose sight of the actual person because of it and demand something that’s so incredibly selfish. I-I don’t want to do that to you.”

Steve was quiet for a long moment and Pepper felt relief that he seemed to be taking her concern with the seriousness and attention that it deserved rather than launching immediately to counter it. 

“When I was in DC,” he started slowly. “I think you might’ve met Sam but he works with the VA. I’ve sat in on a couple of the meetings when I’m in town but...there were a couple of people there that, I guess their partners came to the same realization that you did with Tony. Being with someone, _ loving  _ someone, who’s willingly stepping into the front lines, willingly putting themselves at risk. It’s not easy.” 

“I can respect that, Pepper,” Steve said, meeting her eyes with a slightly sad smile. “I’ll be honest though,” he continued. “I would really like the opportunity to see where this can go. I-I think it could be good. Really good.”

Pepper dropped her eyes to her hands and drew a slow breath in an attempt to settle the torrent in her mind. She wondered if it would be easier, somehow, if he wasn’t so damned understanding. If he were actually upset, angry, then maybe she wouldn’t feel so guilty and like she was hurting both of them just to prevent being hurt worse later. When she felt slightly more in control of herself, she looked back up and offered a wobbly smile, shaking her head slowly, “I really don’t think I can, Steve. I’m sorry.”

“Please don’t apologize for being honest with me,” he said quietly but firmly. “I understand, really I do.”

“I’m sorry,” she repeated, unable to think of anything more to say.

“Now who’s apologizing for things they don’t need to apologize for,” Steve teased gently. After a moment, he pushed to his feet and leaned down far enough to press a soft kiss to her cheek. “Thank you for telling me. I’ll see you around, Pepper.”

She nodded shakily and stared blankly at her hands as he left the room. Pepper swallowed thickly when she heard the door close softly and sighed. She only allowed herself a few moments longer to linger on her whirling thoughts and feelings before shoving them forcefully to the side and grabbing her laptop from her desk and irritably forcing her mind to focus on her work. 

She didn’t have to like it for it to be the right thing to do. And Tony was right, that wasn’t something she could do again and certainly not something she could let herself do to someone else again.

* * *

After the conversation, things seemed to go back to  _ almost _ normal. Pepper still came across Steve frequently and they still lingered to talk when it happened. He was still unfailingly polite and as sweet as he had been before she called it quits on the potential relationship before it had gotten a chance to start. She could see, though, that his smiles were a bit tighter and could see the way his shoulders dropped just slightly when he would turn to leave. He hadn’t joined Natasha and her on Saturdays since then. He didn’t stop by her office anymore, either.

Pepper hadn’t realized until it stopped that the random office visits would be something she could miss.

She didn’t, couldn’t, regret being honest with him but that didn’t mean she didn’t have regrets in general. Pepper couldn’t help but wish that she was strong enough to be able to be the type of partner he deserved. Despite what he believed, she knew she wasn’t. She didn’t need to repeat history to know that.

And then she stopped coming across him. After months of having that odd happenstance being the highlights of her day, it stung when it was gone. Even with as friendly as she and Steve had become, she hadn’t expected his sudden absence to leave such a gaping hole in her world. 

It was a few weeks later, on one of the rare nights that she wasn’t stuck in her office until some ridiculously late hour, that she managed to have a surprisingly relaxing evening to hangout with Natasha, something other than their weekly training that she still dedicated her Saturdays to, that she finally got the opportunity to ask.

“I haven’t seen Steve around in a while,” she hedged.

Natasha quirked a brow and shrugged, “He’s been following up on some leads.”

“Oh,” Pepper said. “He didn’t mention he was leaving.”

“No, I don’t imagine he would,” Natasha replied slowly. The mild tone that she used confirmed Peppers suspicions that Natasha knew something about what had, or hadn’t, happened between the two of them.

“I was just wondering,” Pepper shrugged dismissively

“The team all knew where he was going and he’s checking in regularly,” Natasha added. “Steve’s tough. He’ll be okay, Pepper.”

“No, no, I know that,” she said, taking a slow drink from her wine glass rather than just fiddling with the stem. On one hand, she was relieved because at least that meant that Steve wasn’t actually actively avoiding her. On the other hand, though, she wasn’t sure if she was more disappointed that she was only just learning that he left or concerned for his well-being. It was likely best that she kept those thoughts to herself, though.

The conversation was similar and yet very different a week later when she found herself at lunch with Tony. She still hadn’t seen or heard anything about Steve. Natasha certainly wasn’t one to share details, especially considering that Pepper got the impression that the woman knew at least something of what had happened even if she hadn’t said as much. 

“You know,” Tony said thoughtfully, glaring slightly at his sandwich as though it had done something highly offensive. “I don’t get it. We’ve all offered to help and, let’s be real, if anyone’s got a chance of finding a brainwashed ex-HYDRA assassin, it’s me. And maybe Itsy Bitsy, she’s got skills, sure.”

“A brainwashed ex-HYDRA assassin?” Pepper repeated slowly, thrown by the change in topic and unable to find a thread to follow the conversation. She knew that she was missing something but knew better than to ask. Tony was on one of his rants and she knew from experience that it was better to just let him talk it out. He would say something that made sense eventually. Hopefully.

Tony shrugged half-heartedly. “I just don’t get why Cap chooses to head out with just Wilson and a handful of calls to Nat as backup when he literally has an entire team and a billion dollars worth of technology at his disposal.”

Oh. Pepper recalled Natasha’s comment that Steve had been out chasing leads. And Tony just said that he was looking for an ex-HYDRA assassin? The handful of puzzle pieces that she was being given were slowly starting to make sense while simultaneously not making a single bit of sense at all. One thing that the conversation was highlighting, though, was that Tony clearly had no idea that she had no rights to the information being handed over freely.

She cleared her throat awkwardly and shrugged, “It sounds to me like he doesn’t want to burden the team with whatever he’s dealing with, Tony.”

“That’s the point of having a team, Pep,” Tony frowned in frustration. “What good is having a team, having  _ friends, _ that are too smart, too rich, and too highly-trained for any of their own good if you’re not going to use that when, you know, you actually need it?”

Pepper couldn’t help the small, fond smile at Tony’s words. “Tony,” she said gently. “Think about what you just said and then think about all of the things that you’ve faced,  _ on your own,  _ because you insisted that they were  _ your _ battles to fight.”

“That’s different,” Tony insisted immediately.

“How is that different?” She asked pointedly.

“Because, Pep, I’m not…” He sighed and dropped his sandwich to run a hand over his face. “The difference between Steve and me is that I know I have the team and I choose not to involve them in business that’s my own creation. Steve..” he shook his head and met Pepper’s eye evenly. “Remember those permanent injury things we talked about?”

Pepper nodded and her mind travelled back to the night she came across Steve in the kitchen, slumped and the concerningly blank stare. “You think that he’s reacting on his own because he, what? Doesn’t trust the team?”

Tony snorted but shrugged, “Sure, let’s go with that. Did he say anything to you? About Barnes and that whole mess?”

“No,” she answered quietly, attempting to ignore the rush of guilt. “No, he didn’t say anything.” After a pause she sighed and looked back up from her plate. “Tony...is he okay? I-I don’t mean with what he’s out doing right now. More...in general.”

“I don’t know, Pepper,” Tony admitted. “It’s hard to tell with a guy like Steve and that’s not really something I think he’d tell me. Natasha, maybe but even then it’s doubtful. Not his style to bleed on anyone else.”

Pepper wasn’t sure what to say to that. Her heart twisted at the roundabout confirmation of her concerns. Even if nothing had come of the attempt at dating, she and Steve had still grown friendly. There were the beginning foundations for a solid friendship there. She  _ did _ care, even if she couldn’t care in the way that she wanted to. To know that Steve was hurting the way that he was and so obviously hiding it away from everyone in order to not be burdensome was painful. 

“Have you heard from Rhodey lately?” she asked casually, desperately needing to change the topic of discussion. At least until she had the chance to get her own thoughts and feelings about Steve settled into something of an understandable organization. 

Tony, thankfully, took the bait and let the conversation move a long but not without shooting her a curious glance. 


	5. Chapter 5

The middle of the day on Tuesdays usually wasn’t the most thrilling. Even the days that there were meetings, Pepper couldn’t exactly say that it was exciting. It was understandable, she thought, that she had expected more of the same when she settled at her desk to go over reports that had--finally--been sent over just that morning. 

What she definitely  _ didn’t _ expect was to be interrupted by the loud, shrieking alarm that she knew from experience would be echoing through every floor of the tower that contained civilians. A protocol Tony implemented after Loki used the tower to welcome aliens to New York. Or for the building to tremble around her immediately following the alarm. 

Nor did she expect the door to her office to slam open forcefully and be greeted, not by SI security like she might have expected, but by the sight of Steve Rogers in full Captain America regalia, shield in hand. Because apparently that was her lot in life now, her almost-ex--was that the term? Pepper wasn’t sure how she ought to reference Steve, actually--falling off the face of the earth for a couple of months and reappearing in time to kick in her office door in a crisis.

She thought her momentary lapse of coherence was understandable, given the situation. “So much for a quiet Tuesday,” she muttered with a resigned sigh.

“Come on,” he said firmly, though she was sure she had seen the upward, amused quirk of his lips before it disappeared just as quickly. “We need to get you out of here.”

“What’s going on?” She asked, but immediately pulled open the bottom drawer of her desk and pulled out the pair of flats that she kept handy for days when her heels got to be annoying. She eyed him expectantly as she kicked her shoes off under her desk and stepped into the flats. There was no way she was going to be running through the tower in heels. Priorities, really.

“The tower is under attack,” he said blandly, pointing out the obvious. 

“Huh,” Pepper said sarcastically. “Is  _ that  _ what that was? Thanks, Steve.”

He grinned at the snark and shrugged, “You asked.” And then his expression sobered and he continued “Tony’s got intel that you might be a target.” When she turned to secure her computer he shook his head. “Tony’s already got JARVIS working on network security. Come on.”

“Right,” Pepper muttered but quickly followed him back to the door. “Do you know who it is?”

“Yep,” Steve said shortly as they exited the office, his eyes rapidly scanning the floor before urging her into movement. “Yes, Tony, I got her,” he said a moment later, tone exasperated. “What’s the status of the rest of the evac?”

Apparently, she wasn’t getting any answers just yet. She glared at the back of his ridiculous cowl-helmet-thing and he must have sensed it because a brief moment later, he glanced over his shoulder and smirked slightly before urging her to follow him without any further explanation.

They didn’t face any problems until they reached the end of the floor where the main stairwells and elevators were located. It was almost as though the elevator was waiting for their arrival, the doors opening just as they rounded the corner. Steve pushed her back around the corner, covering her as much as possible with his large frame and the shield as rapid-fire gun shots immediately started.

His body tensed and he threw the shield back in the direction of the gunshots and stepped back, “Stay here,” he instructed firmly. Unlike during their date when she stubbornly followed after, this time Pepper stayed put when Steve ducked back around the corner, catching his shield out of the air as he went.

She could admit that she was relieved when the gunfire cut off suddenly and even more so that the pained shout that followed didn’t sound like it had come from Steve. It was only moments later when Steve was back in front of her, pushing her more firmly against the wall and hunching forward until her face was pressed against his chest. Before she could question the move a small explosion burst from the area of the elevators. 

As soon as the dust began to settle, Steve was moving them again. She could vaguely hear him talking, presumably to his team over the comms but between the alarm still shrieking through the floor and the ringing in her ears thanks to both the explosion and no small degree of panic, she couldn’t be sure. A door slammed behind them and Pepper realized that he had moved them into the stairwell and then suddenly there were hands on her face.

It was an odd feeling, the smooth leather against her face rather than the warmth of his actual hands. Pepper wasn’t entirely sure why her mind was focusing on that particular point. She blinked rapidly to drag her focus back to the man trying to speak to her.

“Breathe, Pepper,” he urged gently but firmly. 

She shook herself slightly and then nodded. “Right. I’m okay. I’m okay,” Pepper said, taking a slow breath to bring her mind back on track. And then she frowned, eyes widening and brows furrowed, staring in muted horror at the darkening material of his uniform at his shoulder. “But you’re not! Steve, you were shot.”

“Yeah,” he said with a short, huffed laugh. Because apparently getting shot was a thing that was funny? “I’m fine. We need to keep moving though, come on.”

“What? No,” she argued. “You need to put pressure or-or something on that!”

“Pepper,” Steve sighed. “I’m fine.”

She caught a hold of his wrist as he turned away. Pepper knew that, realistically, she couldn’t have stopped him if he really didn’t want to be stopped but he froze when she touched him, eyes snapping back up to meet hers. “Steve, stop,” she urged. “Let-Let me at least wrap it. Or-or  _ something. _ ”

“There’s no need to waste time on that,” he dismissed firmly. “It was a clean shot, straight through the muscle. A half an hour and there won’t be much more than a scab. By morning there won’t even be much left of a scar. I’m  _ fine. _ ”

Pepper suddenly recalled the minor confrontation courtesy of Tony just after she had gone on the one date with Steve.  _ We’ve yet to find a physical injury that Cap isn’t capable of recovering from. That includes a should-be fatal plane crash and seventy years frozen at the bottom of the ocean, if that tells you anything. _

Suddenly, Natasha’s vague grumbling about Steve’s recklessness and lack of self-preservation made a horrifying amount of sense. She swallowed down whatever protest she might have made, understanding that she wouldn’t get anywhere during a hostile situation.

And that she really didn’t have the right or the place to protest.

Instead, she just met his gaze evenly and nodded once in understanding. “Okay, let’s go,” she agreed.

Being witness to the way Steve Rogers fought was an experience all on its own in addition to the chaos of the day. Pepper had seen him at the punching bags in the gym, more than once even, and had sparred with him and watched him spar more freely against Natasha. But it was safe to say none of that had prepared her for reality. Despite having already been reassured of his rapid healing and durability, she couldn’t quite help the automatic flinch at the small, muffled grunts that accompanied each hit he took.

Even if it would heal quickly, it still had to hurt at the time, didn’t it?

That concern was knocked promptly out of her mind by a heavy set of arms wrapping tightly around her waist, pinning her arms to her side. Steve spun to face her at the startled sound that escaped.

“Easy, Captain,” a rough voice said, just over her head. “Got no issues with you.”

There were several things, a whole list really, that Pepper had quickly grown fed up with from the moment she had been hired on as Tony’s personal assistant. She could list every one of them both alphabetically and in order of annoyance level. There were some days that the list was short and sweet and others where it was lengthy. But if there was just  _ one thing _ that remained at the top of that list on a permanent basis, it was men who found it conveniently easy to forget that Pepper Potts was  _ not  _ some helpless, incapable damsel in distress. 

That, and she didn’t just  _ work _ for Tony Stark and she didn’t just share a space in the same building as Natasha Romanoff and Steve Rogers. If any of them had taught her anything, it was how to protect herself.

She grit her teeth and took advantage of the man’s obvious underestimation of her. Natasha had long ago taught her how to push through the pain that came with slamming her head back into the guy’s nose. As soon as she made impact, she listened to Natasha’s voice in her ear and reached back--half insulted but mostly gratified to find that the man had seemingly forgotten his cup that day, convenient really, too bad for him though--and wrenched down as hard as she could. 

The man cried out loudly, and satisfyingly high pitched, and Pepper forced down the urge to grin as she broke from the hold. She released her grip to bring her arm up to drive an elbow into the pressure points on his ribs and then drove the heel of her hand into the underside of his jaw as she turned. Pepper stumbled back a few steps until she was right next to Steve, gratefully putting distance between herself and the man. Steve promptly gave his shield an almost lazy throw, nailing him square in the forehead and the man dropped like a stone to the ground.

“Told you that you coulda just punched ‘em,” Steve said with an appreciative smirk as he caught the shield on its return without looking. 

Pepper couldn’t help the small, amused huff and smile at the quip and shrugged, “I have to say that’s almost as satisfying as verbally eviscerating them in the boardroom.”

Steve grinned and reached for her, tugging her by the hand until they were moving quickly through the building. The next hour seemed to pass in a blur. At some point, Steve had left her with Natasha and trailed back out into the fray to help the rest of the team to put an end to the attack. She could hear several more small-scale explosions during time that Nat had forced her into a corner where she wouldn’t end up in the way.

When it was over, Natasha sighed and leaned back against the wall next to Pepper, “That was fun.”

Pepper choked out a laugh and ran a hand tiredly over her face, wincing when her face was far more tender than she had realized. A moment later, the sound of repulsors reverberated around them and Tony landed in front of them, the faceplate snapping back as soon as his booted feet hit the ground. 

“Ladies,” Tony greeted, eyes scanning Pepper critically for injury. “Everyone good here?”

“We’re good, Tony. She had a supersoldier escort,” Natasha said with a small smirk. “Time to start clean up?”

“Already got it covered. My building, my mess, my clean up,” Tony dismissed. “Head on up and get comfortable. We’ll meet you up there.”

“I should go back to my office,” Pepper countered. “See what sort of damage and if there’s anything compromised.”

“I’ve already got JARVIS looking into it,” Tony said with a shake of his head and then suddenly met Natasha’s eye, exchanging a wide-eyed concerned look that neither put words to. Pepper took that to mean something worrying had been passed over the comms. “Go get cleaned up and comfortable, Pep. And stay with Nat until we’re sure we’ve got them all. I gotta go. Help. With stuff.”

“With stuff, right,” Pepper said, eyes narrowed suspiciously but Tony was gone, shooting off into the air before the statement was completely out of her mouth. She stared after him before swinging her suspicious glare to Natasha, who met her stare uneffected.

“What was that?” Pepper asked.

“Let’s go,” Natasha said, ignoring the question and leading the way to the stairwell. Pepper had a brief moment to wonder why they wouldn’t take the elevator and then recalled the minor explosion while Steve was fighting on her office level. Cleaning up and restoring the tower was going to be interesting. And expensive.

She was grateful, again, to have left her heels under her desk, though.

Pepper waited as patiently as she could until they were safely on the common level of the Avengers portion of the tower before turning back to Natasha. “What was that Natasha?” She asked again. “What had you and Tony so worried when you were just pissed off when Steve first left me with you.”

“Pepper,” Natasha sighed. “You really don’t want me to answer that.”

“Why?” She asked, eyes narrowed.

“Because this is exactly the part of ‘our world’ that you don’t want to be a part of, Pepper,” Natasha answered crisply with a surprising amount of heat.

“Someone’s hurt,” Pepper guessed. “Badly, if your and Tony’s reactions are anything to go by.” Natasha just stared blankly, not bothering to offer a response. Pepper narrowed her eyes thoughtfully, considering what she did and didn’t know about the situation to formulate a guess and her eyes widened slightly. “It’s Steve, isn’t it?”

“Don’t ask questions that you can’t handle the answers to,” Natasha said simply, turning away and moving seamlessly into the kitchen. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go! The last chapter of this fun little adventure. I hope that you enjoy!

Pepper lingered on the Avengers level far longer than she typically allowed herself to, trailing almost absently between the kitchen and the living room. The rest of the team came and went, eyeing her curiously but not sticking around to talk. The rest of them save for Tony and Steve that was. She assumed Tony had either headed directly for his lab or was discussing clean up with security and whomever else he called in for the massive undertaking. And Steve was…

Pepper shook her head and settled on one of the stools at the counter, tapping her fingers absently against the marble. She really should return to her own apartment, a shower would be beyond welcome and Natasha had informed her hours ago that it was safe for her to go. But everytime she made her way toward the door, she couldn’t quite bring herself to leave. Natasha must have read something in her expression, though Pepper couldn’t be sure what, because she smiled in understanding and handed Pepper a clean set of comfortable clothes to change into.

It was late, pushing into the early morning hours, when the door opened again to reveal an weary and exhausted looking Steve. Pepper was on her feet the moment she registered the new arrival but she forced herself to remain where she was, instead, taking the opportunity to take him in. 

Weary and exhausted were absolutely accurate descriptions. He was paler than usual and his broad shoulders slumped, his head hanging low. As he walked off of the elevator--Pepper was absently relieved to see it back up and running properly--his movements were more of a stiff shuffle than the comparatively easy grace that he usually moved with. He must have showered and changed at some point, his uniform traded for a comfortable looking pair of sweatpants and t-shirt. Worn and haggard, perhaps, but he was okay. That was the important part.

He looked up suddenly, apparently noticing her presence for the first time and his drained expression lightened and he gave a tired smile. “Hey,” he greeted quietly.

Pepper moved then, rushing forward before she could stop herself and hugging him tightly around the waist. Despite his evident stiffness and the muffled grunt when she first collided against him, his arms were snuggly around her immediately, one around her back and the other cupping the back of her head and holding her to him with a gentleness that should have seemed entirely at odds with the viciousness he had fought with earlier.

“It’s okay,” he murmured quietly in her ear, pressing a soft kiss to her hair. “I’m okay.”

“Sorry,” she said shakily. “I’m sorry, I-I just…”

He shushed her softly and stroked her back comfortingly, “I know. I’m sorry that I worried you. I’m okay, promise.” 

She nodded and cleared her throat and pulled back slightly, withdrawing one hand from around him to wipe at her eyes but leaving the other to hold tightly. His hand at the back of her head shifted, his thumb brushing over the bruising on her cheek with a concerned frown of his own.

“You’re okay, too?” he asked, seemingly no more willing to let go of her than Pepper was to let go of him.

“Yeah,” she answered with a shaky smile. “Yeah, I-uh-few bruises but nothing-nothing permanent.”

“Good,” Steve said, relief evident in his voice. 

“I should let you get some sleep,” she said without making any move to pull away, her head falling forward against his chest instead. “That-that would help? Right? With your healing?”

“If you want,” he agreed evenly and then hesitated a brief moment before adding. “Or you could stay.”

“Steve,” she started quietly.

“I know. I know, I’m sorry,” he sighed, letting his arms fall loose. “I’m sorry, Pepper, I shouldn’t have said that.”

“That’s actually not what I was going to say,” Pepper replied, surprising both of them. She bit back a sigh and stepped back reluctantly, nodding toward the couch. When they settled side by side, she hesitated before speaking carefully. 

“I-I guess today kind of made me realize that I'm already a part of that world, if only tangeantly,” she sighed. “I think I have been from the moment Tony had me snoop through Stane’s computer. Earlier, probably.”

“That doesn’t mean you need to involve yourself anymore than you already are though,” Steve said gently. “Pepper, I fully understand why you wouldn’t want to be a part of this and that’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with that. I shouldn’t have pressed.”

“But this is  _ worse, _ ” she argued. “To  _ know _ something is happening. With you and Tony and Natasha and-and the others. To basically live alongside you and  _ care _ about you. And yet still be on the outside looking in and always--always left pretending that I don’t care. That it’s somehow easier to just look the other way. Like that’s somehow sparing me the worry and it  _ doesn’t _ . Being on the peripheral and keeping myself there because I’m afraid. “ 

She frowned and shook her head, meeting his eye hesitantly. “What’s worse? Being afraid of losing people I care about or pretending that I don’t care so that  _ maybe  _ it doesn’t hurt as much when I do?”

Steve, to her surprise, huffed a small laugh and smiled warmly, “You’re an incredible woman, Pepper Potts.”

“What?” She blinked in confusion.

“Pretending not to care is the easier thing to do,” Steve shrugged. “The majority of the world does it every day. Turning their heads and looking away, pretending that they don’t see the awfulness of the world. You see it and you’re afraid of it but you want to do the hard thing and care anyway.”

“I don’t think it’s quite that selfless,” she admitted. “It’s the kind of the opposite. I’m selfish enough to know that I don’t want to keep pretending not to see and feel because if I do, I lose anyway. I lose the right to care when things are good or bad.”

“I don’t think that’s selfish,” Steve said with a small smile, reaching across and squeezing her hand gently. “Or, if it is, not so selfish that it’s a bad thing.”

Pepper eyed his hand for a brief moment before shifting her own to thread their fingers together. “I’m still afraid,” she admitted. “I don’t want to go back to being that woman I was with Tony. But...I don’t want to keep trying to pretend that I don’t care--that I don’t  _ want  _ this _ \-- _ I don’t want to let it keep me captive in my own mind anymore either.”

“Then don’t,” Steve responded softly.

Pepper studied him curiously for a moment, letting the simple statement settle her remaining nerves.  _ Then don’t. _ Was it that simple? She wasn’t sure but...was trying worse than pretending? When she allowed herself to think about it,  _ really think about it, _ it both was and wasn’t that simple. But it was her choice and  _ that _ part, at least, was simple.

He made a soft, startled sound when she leaned in and kissed him. She kissed him like she had wanted to do when he had so attentively made sure that her helmet was on safely or when he took the time to distract a scared young woman from a bad date until her mother arrived. Like she had wanted to for  _ months _ but had given into her fears and hadn’t. 

Pepper could feel the slow creeping upturn of his lips when he smiled into it. She let her eyes close when his hand, not laced with hers, rose to brush lightly over her cheek before sliding back to cup the back of her head. Neither attempted to push for more or tried to deepen it. The kiss wasn’t a build up for more, it wasn’t an expectation. It was a beginning. As much as she might have been disappointed after their date when he simply bid her good night, she couldn’t help but think that, maybe, this was better.

Steve slowly broke the kiss and let his head rest against hers. Somehow, the gesture felt more intimate and affectionate than the kiss had. After a moment, he pressed another soft kiss to her forehead and slumped back against the couch with a groan. He tugged on the hand still laced with hers, releasing the hold to tuck his arm around her shoulders as she shifted on the couch until she was settled leaning more comfortably. 

“What a day,” he huffed tiredly. He grinned when she laughed at the drastic understatement. The humor dissipated when her attention was caught on the muffled, bitten back grunt when she shifted against his side. It came back to her then, why she had still been lingering on the Avengers floor hours after she should have left and everyone else already had.

Pepper sat back, not far enough to dislodge his arm around her but just enough to take her weight off of his side. “No one would tell me what happened,” she said quietly. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” Steve sighed. “Nothin’ that won’t heal within the next day or so. It’s just still a little tender s’all.” He grimaced slightly at her questioning look and shrugged. “It’s nothing major, Pepper. I’ll be back to normal by this time Thursday, don’t worry about it, please.”

She bit back the urge to argue, to try to get more actual answers. Pepper could recognize the evasiveness for what it was. Considering her worries and concerns, it was a courtesy that he didn’t seem to want to provide the details that would only make her worry more. It was something that they would both have to work on, she thought. After a moment of consideration, Pepper sighed and mentally agreed on a compromise. “They didn’t wrap your ribs, though?” she asked. 

“Told them not to,” he shrugged. “No sense wasting the supplies on me.”

“Well, I know that medication does little for you,” she said thoughtfully and then sat forward on the couch, tugging on his arm as she went. “Come on.”

“Come where?” he frowned.

“There’s no sense sitting in pain when you don’t have to, Steve,” Pepper chastised gently. “You might heal quickly but you still feel the pain, don’t you?”

“It’s not unbearable,” he shrugged. “I can handle it.”

“Sure. Except for the whole thing where you don’t  _ have  _ to handle it,” she pointed out. “Come on. I can’t do anything to keep it from happening but I can take care of you after, can’t I?”

He was quiet for a long moment, eyes studying her intently and Pepper fought the urge to squirm anxiously. He looked away briefly and then met her eye steadily again, “You don’t have to do that, Pepper.”

“I know,” she said with a small smile. “If I thought I  _ had _ to, like it was a requirement, this would be a very different conversation. Now, come on.” She said firmly, catching his hand as she stood from the couch.

“Where to?” he said by way of concession. 

“Going by your whole ‘grin-and-bear-it’ mentality, I’m assuming you don’t have much by way of first aid type supplies,” Pepper pointed out dryly. “And I’ve managed to accumulate a surprising number of ace wraps over the years.”

He shuffled hesitantly but compliantly along with her to the elevator and down to her apartment. Pepper led the way through her apartment and into her ensuite bathroom and then crouched to dig out the little plastic bin that held her embarrassingly large collection of the wraps and set it on the counter while he watched cautiously from the doorway. Pepper pulled herself up to sit on the counter and waved him forward, reaching out to tug gently at his waist to urge him closer when he stopped a foot away.

“Is this okay?” she asked gently, looking up to meet his eyes when she grasped the bottom hem of his shirt.

“Yeah,” he said and then smirked teasingly. “Nothin’ you’ve not seen already.”

Her face heated slightly at the reminder but Pepper rolled her eyes and carefully helped him out of his shirt. Any admiration that she might have taken of his form was waylaid by the dark mottled bruising covering the majority of his torso. The edges had already begun taking on a greenish hue but it still looked incredibly painful. 

“Steve,” she breathed, her fingers ghosting over the bruised skin. She bit back the urge to ask questions, to find out what had done this sort of damage. That wasn’t what she was here to do. Pepper cleared her throat roughly and turned to dig through her stockpile of bandages before selecting the ones she wanted. With careful, practiced movements, she nudged his arms out of the way and set to wrapping the bandages around him to best support the damage done while his body healed it.

“You’re good at this,” Steve commented after a few minutes of silence.

Pepper glanced up from her work briefly to find him watching her intently. She smiled wryly and shrugged, “Not the first set of ribs I’ve needed to wrap. There’s a reason I’ve got a stash of these.”

“Your own?” he asked curiously.

She hummed in confirmation as she turned her attention back to the task at hand. “Yeah, there were several years where balance and coordination weren’t exactly my best traits,” she said dryly. “And picking up sparring with Natasha meant I needed to drag these things back out more than a couple times.”

“You were clumsy as a kid?” he said with an amused smile.

“Very,” she admitted emphatically. “Put a clumsy girl into competitive sports through high school and college and you get entirely too many accidental injuries.” She carefully tucked the end of the bandage into itself, unwilling to use the sharp pointed clasps on tender skin, and leaned back. “There, how’s that feel?”

Steve took a deep, cautious breath and then nodded slowly with a small smile, “It’s good. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” she returned. 

Pepper could admit that she fully expected him to politely excuse himself then so she was admittedly surprised when, instead, he shuffled forward, nudging gently at her knees until he could stand between them. His head dropped down to rest against hers again when she looked up and he sighed shakily. 

“A-are you sure this is what you want, Pepper?” he asked quietly. “Because you should know that I really,  _ really _ want to kiss you right now but I need to know that-that you’re sure. And I really need you to be honest with me.”

She was still unsure about a lot of things. There was much of this that still prickled at her anxieties and fears. But those were all things that they could talk about and work through. That wasn’t the question asked though and she felt a warm rush of happiness when she could honestly answer, “I’m sure.”

When he did kiss her it was barely more than a brush of lips against hers at first. And then it was nothing like that at all. Steve shuffled in closer and his hands rose to cup her face and kissed her more firmly, more deliberately. Pepper leaned into it, her knees tightening at his hips and hands sliding up his chest to hold onto his shoulders after reminding herself of the state of his torso. 

Suddenly it was everything that the first kiss on the couch hadn’t been. There seemed to be intent in it on both sides that hadn’t been there just moments before. It was a kiss that was building to something more, if they let it. Pepper was fairly certain, in that moment, that she wasn’t remotely interested in stopping it. Steve groaned low against her mouth when her legs tightened around his hips in an automatic response to an insistent sweep of his tongue against her own. 

He carefully broke the kiss then, his head resting against hers again as they both fought to catch their breath. “I should go,” he murmured though countering the statement by ducking in for another lingering kiss.

“Or you could stay,” she countered against his lips with his own words from earlier.

“Don’t tempt me,” he said lowly, smiling in heated amusement.

“Maybe I want to tempt you,” Pepper grinned. And then she pulled back just enough to glance down as she ran her hands gently over his wrapped torso. “But maybe not tonight,” she conceded, looking back up with. “You could still stay though.” 

She tilted her head thoughtfully and slid her arms loosely around his waist, careful to minimize pressure on any bruising, and then smiled, “And then maybe tomorrow you might let me make it up to you? Lunch, maybe?”

Steve smiled slowly but genuinely at the familiar words. “Dinner,” he countered. “You can take me to dinner.”


End file.
